THAT SMILE

  We all smile and have many moments that cause us to smile, giggle, laugh or ROTFL. I love the moments that cause our lips to take that upward turn.
     The one smile I am talking about is a smile that sadly, I have not seen in a while. Since this particular smile has been absent in my life, it was a huge blessing to catch a glimpse of it.
     Graduation causes many smiles. I have never caught someone crying with sadness due to being honored with a diploma, the award of a job well done. Tears can flow out of pride or the thoughts of a child growing up and leaving home but not for the accomplishment itself.
     Smiles and laughter were abundant when my son, Chaz, graduated from Welding School.
     His girlfriend, Camryn and I, had our shares of smiles and laughter as we watched the graduation ceremony proceed.
     I could not see Chaz walking in as Pomp and Circumstance played, so I stood on my chair to catch a glimpse of my boy! He smiled as I yelled out his name and threw up my appropriate gang sign for the occasion - a thumbs up!
     Ryan was more sedate and just smiled. Ryan is my rock and really helped raise Chaz. He is very proud of Chaz and loves him very much.
    Brandon loved the picture taking session after the ceremony. He loves his Chazzy.
     We sat a bit impatiently during the speakers as they ramped up for the walk across the stage to receive diplomas. We spent that time frame getting important things done, like making sure my restaurant game was running smoothly and catching up on Facebook.
     Then finally the students made their way to the side of the stage. I captured Chaz's walk on video. I was so proud of him.
     There were others in attendance that were proud of him, too! Ryan was very proud of this young man that he saw grow up from age 9 and on.
     Brandon, his youngest brother, was there ready to hug Chaz and kick him in the shin at the same time. Oh the joy of that brotherly love/hate relationship.
     Camryn, his girlfriend, was there to hug and kiss, repeat. She is so supportive of Chaz and not only does Chaz love her, I do, too!
     Also there to celebrate with Chaz were his Dad, Gaah & Pea. I would love to have seen all of them to say, hi. I tried to seek them out but they were swallowed up in a sea of exuberant people.
     No time to worry about finding them. I was there to celebrate my graduate, Chaz! Pride falls short of my feelings that I had for him.
     I flashed back to raising him and the countless hours of smiles and joy he had given me amidst the tears, worry and sleepless nights. He sure was giving me PRIDE on steroids this night!
     Another proud person was his Dad.
     Camryn and I were busy positioning the graduate in various poses for the perfect pics. Then he had to go for a group shot with his graduating class.
     Camryn and I were stuck in the front with the swarm of people trying to capture their graduate amidst all the class of 2015 members.
     That's when I saw that smile!! My heart stopped and I relished the moment. Years of memories of that smile flashed in my mind's eye.
     Camryn was talking and I slowly drifted back to reality and my heart started pumping.
     I quickly turned away to see if I could see that smile again. All I saw was him walking away, melting into the crowd.
     I was happy and sad.
     He had that smile when the son we were there to celebrate was born. When the Dr announced it was a boy, I saw that smile.
     That smile spoke volumes. He smiled like that when we were married. He smiled like that when the birth of our children happened. He smiled like that when I visited him at Mineral Wells.
     I never wanted to stop sharing those smiles with him.
     I am thrilled he got to see his son graduate from Welding School. I am glad he can still share in moments like that and those like today as he helps our son move into his first apartment.
     If it all fell into place like God had intended and what we vowed to one another then we would share these moments together.
     We would of weathered the storms and triumphs of marriage together.
     As he once promised, he wanted to grow old with me and sit in a rocking chair on the front porch together.
    So, it was a happy and sad day.
     As much as I wanted to see him and talk to him on Chaz's graduation day, I was excited to see " THAT SMILE" and it gave me great satisfaction to know that he was so very happy for our son.
     Divorce sucks but true love lasts forever! I am grateful for the memories! "That Smile" is forever etched in my mind and on my heart.