Monday, March 28, 2011
Friday, March 18, 2011
Anticipation & Its Affects
I have waited for and anticipated the phone call from my Dr. since I had my EGD done on March 9, 2011.
While waiting for that call, I had many thoughts traipsing around in my head. And traipsing is what those thoughts did… walked around in my head needlessly. Most of all I envisioned myself laying on a hospital bed, in pain, and dying of some rare disease.
Then I envisioned myself at my funeral.
My thoughts after seeing myself at my funeral - I need to get an invitation list started cause there was not the expected number of guests that I had imagined would be there.
They were also all sad and pitiful looking - “that won’t do”, I screamed at them.
I was dead … no pain, up in Heaven jaw-jacking with GOD….so why so sad? Oh, I see now - jealousy!! Yeah, I was living the high life now!
I also don’t want people wearing black - that is so awful!!! Wear happy, bright colors.
I think I want the beach party atmosphere at my funeral. Everyone should be given leis as they arrive at my viewing and funeral! Everyone will get lei’d at my funeral!! Awesomeness.
Do you think it is possible to have an open casket at oceanside? I figure, just leave me out there for a couple days and nights … everyone can come and party with me at their leisure. Feel free to place your cans & bottles on my coffin cause even if it does leave a water stain, who cares??? I will soon be 6 feet in the ground.
Do you think I should hire a funeral planner?
Death and the funeral was not the only thing on my mind while I was waiting for that phone call.
I thought of fund raising activities that I could do to obtain the services of a medical team. I thought of how I could possibly conquer this awful thing that took up residence in my body, uninvited, I might add.
Then I thought that I would purge this unwanted, uninvited thing from my body by praying it out. I started praying for the cells in my body to heal. I took up a new interest in losing weight and eating healthy.
Then I got the phone call…."Hi, yes, this is Dianne." Then she asked how I was doing?? Very nervy little bitch, when she held the paper in her hand that told her exactly how the heck I was doing!!! I said I was ok or was I?? I demanded she tell me how I was doing??
She started saying things like, no celiac disease, no strictures, blah, blah, (I was getting irritated as she rambled on in some foreign language,medical-ease, when would she get to the stuff I wanted to know?) and no sign of cancer!! There was what I wanted to hear but didn't think she would ever get through her dissertation!! Woo Hoo…..yes it is true, no cancer. I don’t need a funeral planner yet.
I still think a beach get together of some sort is in order - I will even lay down in the casket for a bit. We could have my funeral dress rehearsal!!! Who is in?? Text me!!
She did inform me that I had a very inflamed stomach. Yeah, thats why I went to the Dr in the first place. Told me to start taking the old medicine in a new way. Thank God she did not tell me I had to insert it rectally! I just have to increase the number of times I take the Pantoprazol. Sweet.
Famous Daves BBQ here I come!!! Diet, you ask??? Yes, I did that for a week….I’m good now - I guess it really works.
Any ideas on what beach we should use for this funeral dress rehearsal??
Seriously tho - thanks for all your prayers!!
While waiting for that call, I had many thoughts traipsing around in my head. And traipsing is what those thoughts did… walked around in my head needlessly. Most of all I envisioned myself laying on a hospital bed, in pain, and dying of some rare disease.
Then I envisioned myself at my funeral.
My thoughts after seeing myself at my funeral - I need to get an invitation list started cause there was not the expected number of guests that I had imagined would be there.
They were also all sad and pitiful looking - “that won’t do”, I screamed at them.
I was dead … no pain, up in Heaven jaw-jacking with GOD….so why so sad? Oh, I see now - jealousy!! Yeah, I was living the high life now!
I also don’t want people wearing black - that is so awful!!! Wear happy, bright colors.
I think I want the beach party atmosphere at my funeral. Everyone should be given leis as they arrive at my viewing and funeral! Everyone will get lei’d at my funeral!! Awesomeness.
Do you think it is possible to have an open casket at oceanside? I figure, just leave me out there for a couple days and nights … everyone can come and party with me at their leisure. Feel free to place your cans & bottles on my coffin cause even if it does leave a water stain, who cares??? I will soon be 6 feet in the ground.
Do you think I should hire a funeral planner?
Death and the funeral was not the only thing on my mind while I was waiting for that phone call.
I thought of fund raising activities that I could do to obtain the services of a medical team. I thought of how I could possibly conquer this awful thing that took up residence in my body, uninvited, I might add.
Then I thought that I would purge this unwanted, uninvited thing from my body by praying it out. I started praying for the cells in my body to heal. I took up a new interest in losing weight and eating healthy.
Then I got the phone call…."Hi, yes, this is Dianne." Then she asked how I was doing?? Very nervy little bitch, when she held the paper in her hand that told her exactly how the heck I was doing!!! I said I was ok or was I?? I demanded she tell me how I was doing??
She started saying things like, no celiac disease, no strictures, blah, blah, (I was getting irritated as she rambled on in some foreign language,medical-ease, when would she get to the stuff I wanted to know?) and no sign of cancer!! There was what I wanted to hear but didn't think she would ever get through her dissertation!! Woo Hoo…..yes it is true, no cancer. I don’t need a funeral planner yet.
I still think a beach get together of some sort is in order - I will even lay down in the casket for a bit. We could have my funeral dress rehearsal!!! Who is in?? Text me!!
She did inform me that I had a very inflamed stomach. Yeah, thats why I went to the Dr in the first place. Told me to start taking the old medicine in a new way. Thank God she did not tell me I had to insert it rectally! I just have to increase the number of times I take the Pantoprazol. Sweet.
Famous Daves BBQ here I come!!! Diet, you ask??? Yes, I did that for a week….I’m good now - I guess it really works.
Any ideas on what beach we should use for this funeral dress rehearsal??
Seriously tho - thanks for all your prayers!!
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Dianne's Journey: THE ILLUSIONIST
Dianne's Journey: THE ILLUSIONIST: "The Illusionist - might that be you? Have you ever stopped to think about it? Probably not. I didn't until I was walking down the street the..."
Saturday, March 5, 2011
CHEWING GUM
Hmmmm......what flavor of gum for me? Oh, there it is - Dentyne Ice. I make my purchase and immediatly pop out a piece of the gum from its blister pack and start chewing.
I am hit with a mouth full of excitement and freshness. Dentyne Ice briefly sets my whole mouth on fire with cool, freshness. Its undescribably pleasant and a bit painful on my tongue. Soon, the flavor settles down and is just pleasant to have in my mouth.
Finally, the gum has lost its pizazz. I usually place the stale piece of gum back in the blister pack and cover it with the piece of the foil packaging that once held it in place.
There are times when I have launched the gum from my mouth with a big thwack sound and it sails in the air and lands somewhere on the ground.
To be totally honest, I also have placed my used up piece of gum under a chair or table, right next to other pieces of colored gum and crusty boogers.
What is my point? Well, as this tiny bubble blew in my head, it started to become larger and larger. Inside the bubble were these thoughts. Now it is time to burst that bubble right here and let you know what thoughts of mine formulated in that bubble.
I was making a comparison of sex to chewing gum.
Each of us are uniquely made by our creator. Each of us holds some tantalizing "flavor" in us.
Our honeymoon night ladies, should be like our husband opening his favorite flavor of gum. He pops you in his mouth and tastes you for the very first time. Then you unwrap your newly betrothed and start to experience him for the first time. What pleasure and ecstasy this moment has for him and you.
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRsssssscccccccrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaatttttttccccchhhhhh
HALT, wait a minute here .... I think something is wrong with the packaging.
Your husband sits up and hocks that gum out of his mouth. He is looking at you, his blushing bride, with doubt and disgust in his eyes. He wonders why this new piece of gum tastes used and stale. Your husband has even chipped a tooth from a stone found within the gum.
You, too, have some issues of your own with the piece he has given to you. Yours tastes of smoke and alcohol. Who is this man that you just married? Why do ghosts of other girlfriends seem to be clouding this special moment between you and your husband?
Both of you have just discovered that neither one of you valued your virginity prior to marriage. Another has taken your fresh piece and chewed it already, received that burst of freshness and newness and then spit you out.
Maybe your piece of gum ended up under one of the bleachers at school. Then another came along and had a little taste of your gum. After the next person was through with your gum, it was spit out . Another person, came along and found that spit out piece of gum on the ground, wiped it off and had a little taste.
Maybe you got a piece that was just scraped off the bottom of someones shoe -yuk. That gum was stuck on a shoe right next to a piece of dog poop - double yuk!
The viscious cycle continued. Then you discovered your one true love, and only wanted that person for the rest of your life. You may have left out details of how you shared your piece of gum with others. You may have thought your spouse would never find out.
How many people have had your piece prior to your wedding night? That piece should have been saved for that very special night. What if you pass more than a bad taste on to your spouse on your wedding night? Possibly you had a stale piece one time and it may have carried with it a disease that may be impossible to ever get rid of.
Still a virgin? Then this story is something for you to think about. My plea to you is that you remain a virgin and only share your piece with your spouse - that is how it is truly meant to be. The experience will be worth your wait!
I, too, am held guilty of passing on a piece of stale gum to my first husband. How I now wish that I had held my piece safely tucked away until my wedding night. Its like that fresh tube of toothpaste. If you squeeze out all the toothpaste, there is no way of putting it back in the tube.
My message is to hold on to your virginity, it precious, it fresh and its meant for the person you are going to marry. It holds true for both guys and girls - virginity is virtuous.
I pray that my daughters have not been passed around like a piece of stale gum, leaving stones and bad taste for their future husband.
I also pray that my sons are wise enough not to use up their first piece on someone other than their wife. I also pray that my sons will not try to obtain a fresh piece just for the sake of a good chew!
I pray that my children will do better at this than their Mom did.
Maybe, you are reading this and you can't count the number of times that your gum has been chewed by someone other than your husband or wife. Don't be discouraged. There is always hope. That hope is found in Jesus Christ - He is the one that can save you from your past and give an awesome flavor to your future.
You can have a new life found by trusting Christ as YOUR personal Lord and Savior. All you have to do is ask. Jesus is always listening.
II Corinthians 5:17 says, "Therefore, if any man (or woman) be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new."
If you have already accepted Christ as Your Savior, then there is forgiveness available to you - all you have to do is ask.
Something for you to chew on. Love, hugs and kisses to all!
Always Smilin',
Dianne
Phil.4:13
I am hit with a mouth full of excitement and freshness. Dentyne Ice briefly sets my whole mouth on fire with cool, freshness. Its undescribably pleasant and a bit painful on my tongue. Soon, the flavor settles down and is just pleasant to have in my mouth.
Finally, the gum has lost its pizazz. I usually place the stale piece of gum back in the blister pack and cover it with the piece of the foil packaging that once held it in place.
There are times when I have launched the gum from my mouth with a big thwack sound and it sails in the air and lands somewhere on the ground.
To be totally honest, I also have placed my used up piece of gum under a chair or table, right next to other pieces of colored gum and crusty boogers.
What is my point? Well, as this tiny bubble blew in my head, it started to become larger and larger. Inside the bubble were these thoughts. Now it is time to burst that bubble right here and let you know what thoughts of mine formulated in that bubble.
I was making a comparison of sex to chewing gum.
Each of us are uniquely made by our creator. Each of us holds some tantalizing "flavor" in us.
Our honeymoon night ladies, should be like our husband opening his favorite flavor of gum. He pops you in his mouth and tastes you for the very first time. Then you unwrap your newly betrothed and start to experience him for the first time. What pleasure and ecstasy this moment has for him and you.
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRsssssscccccccrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaatttttttccccchhhhhh
HALT, wait a minute here .... I think something is wrong with the packaging.
Your husband sits up and hocks that gum out of his mouth. He is looking at you, his blushing bride, with doubt and disgust in his eyes. He wonders why this new piece of gum tastes used and stale. Your husband has even chipped a tooth from a stone found within the gum.
You, too, have some issues of your own with the piece he has given to you. Yours tastes of smoke and alcohol. Who is this man that you just married? Why do ghosts of other girlfriends seem to be clouding this special moment between you and your husband?
Both of you have just discovered that neither one of you valued your virginity prior to marriage. Another has taken your fresh piece and chewed it already, received that burst of freshness and newness and then spit you out.
Maybe your piece of gum ended up under one of the bleachers at school. Then another came along and had a little taste of your gum. After the next person was through with your gum, it was spit out . Another person, came along and found that spit out piece of gum on the ground, wiped it off and had a little taste.
Maybe you got a piece that was just scraped off the bottom of someones shoe -yuk. That gum was stuck on a shoe right next to a piece of dog poop - double yuk!
The viscious cycle continued. Then you discovered your one true love, and only wanted that person for the rest of your life. You may have left out details of how you shared your piece of gum with others. You may have thought your spouse would never find out.
How many people have had your piece prior to your wedding night? That piece should have been saved for that very special night. What if you pass more than a bad taste on to your spouse on your wedding night? Possibly you had a stale piece one time and it may have carried with it a disease that may be impossible to ever get rid of.
Still a virgin? Then this story is something for you to think about. My plea to you is that you remain a virgin and only share your piece with your spouse - that is how it is truly meant to be. The experience will be worth your wait!
I, too, am held guilty of passing on a piece of stale gum to my first husband. How I now wish that I had held my piece safely tucked away until my wedding night. Its like that fresh tube of toothpaste. If you squeeze out all the toothpaste, there is no way of putting it back in the tube.
My message is to hold on to your virginity, it precious, it fresh and its meant for the person you are going to marry. It holds true for both guys and girls - virginity is virtuous.
I pray that my daughters have not been passed around like a piece of stale gum, leaving stones and bad taste for their future husband.
I also pray that my sons are wise enough not to use up their first piece on someone other than their wife. I also pray that my sons will not try to obtain a fresh piece just for the sake of a good chew!
I pray that my children will do better at this than their Mom did.
Maybe, you are reading this and you can't count the number of times that your gum has been chewed by someone other than your husband or wife. Don't be discouraged. There is always hope. That hope is found in Jesus Christ - He is the one that can save you from your past and give an awesome flavor to your future.
You can have a new life found by trusting Christ as YOUR personal Lord and Savior. All you have to do is ask. Jesus is always listening.
II Corinthians 5:17 says, "Therefore, if any man (or woman) be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new."
If you have already accepted Christ as Your Savior, then there is forgiveness available to you - all you have to do is ask.
Something for you to chew on. Love, hugs and kisses to all!
Always Smilin',
Dianne
Phil.4:13
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